Showing posts with label Comics. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Comics. Show all posts
DID SOMEONE SAY SUPERHEROES? I FUCKING LOVE SUPERHEROES
After going an exhausting two (!) weeks without a movie based on comics or toys, the absolute units crack open some cold ones and chat about Deadpool the Second.
Also: Parker watched an obscene amount of Twin Peaks and 90's monster movies, and Chris watched a bunch of racist shit from the 1940s called Calamity Jane on the Orient Express or some garbage like that.
Crack open a cold one with the boys as they sing the praises of one of the most ambitious crossover movies ever! I'm still not sure why they didn't have the Fantastic Four in this.
Not only did Chris pay real life Obama funbucks to see Infinity War in theaters, but he watched nearly the entire MCU beforehand. I have finally broken him. He has reached the event horizon of capeshit.
Crack open a cold one with the boys as they rip open a new one with Hellboy and its sequel! Chris is enamored with Ron Perlman, and Parker gets freaked by the tooth fairies. Also, the absolute lads prepare for Infinity War next week as Parker tries to explain 18 movies worth of plot to someone who doesn't know what an Infinity Stone is.
First I made Chris watch 3 unbearable hours of Batman v Superman. Then I made him pay real American dollars to go see Justice League opening weekend. Well, as you know, revenge is a dish best served cold: ice cold. Nobody ever told him not to hit a man while he's down because he hit me with the one-two punch of Schumacher Batman movies. We touch on the 2 Burton films, but let's be honest with each other, you're here for the ice puns.
Listen to it here
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Wew lads. After our heroic journey through the 3 hour Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice (Ultimate Edition), we have returned to tackle
2016 has come and gone and somehow by the grace of God we're still alive, even if we're only living in the most literal sense of the word. There were eight comic book movies plopped into theaters last year, squeezing every red cent out of my already empty pockets. Time and time again I left the theater and opened my wallet like a Looney Toon and let the moths fly out. I'm a fat guy on the Internet, so why wouldn't I rate them? That's what I'm here for: to pick apart things that other people love to give myself a sense of purpose. I'm only doing the theatrical releases, so I'm not including the DC animated movies. Why? Because I don't want to.
Funny story, I wrote the intro last and it was only then that I remembered The Killing Joke was in theaters for one night via Fathom Events. Am I going to go back and add it? Nope. There's a review already and spoilers: it fucking sucks.
So sit back and enjoy this page sponsored by Marvel Studios, the company that pays me to talk about their amazing and ground breaking content.
The Marvel Cinematic Universe has dug its roots deep into my life and what has blossomed is a reality consumed by bright lights, CGI, and Chris Hemsworth's biceps. I don't live anymore, I merely exist between releases. So here it is, the absolute objective indisputable etched-in-stone ranking of the MCU.
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