Reel Deal, No Sex Appeal

The official podcast of Terrible Blog for Terrible People has finally hit the airwaves! Parker (Big Bob Pataki) and his broken brain have joined up with Chris (Chris the Intern) to deliver the newest vision in dynamic film criticism, a veritable cornucopia of content. A contentcopia, if you will. Sometimes it's about the biggest movie in theaters, sometimes it's about a Brendan Frasier flick from 15 years ago, but it's always full of desperate cries for help. Join us every Tuesday to listen to hot takes galore. 

The absolutely gorgeous cover art was designed and created by the ingenious Krystal Miner. 

Episode XIII: Carrie & The Langoliers

Crack open a cold one with the boys and celebrate Stephen King Month! This week, Chris and Parker are treated to one of the greatest 70s movies of all time, Carrie! Also they have to watch The Langoliers. Maybe this whole thing was a bad idea.

Episode XII: Kingsman: The Golden Circle

Crack open a cold one with the boys as they attempt to answer that age old question: is Elton John in this movie? Follow-up question, this one directed at Matthew Vaughn: do you need to talk about something? Are you cool?

Episode XI: The Cabin in the Woods

Grab your camper van, sleeping bags, bug spray, and conch shells and crack open a cold one with the boys as they spend an evening in The Cabin in the Woods! One of the most beloved horror films of the recent years, this one has both Chris and Parker bursting at the seems.

Episode X: It

Crack open a cold one with the boys and float on over to Derry, Maine for the newest Stephen King adaptation! This week Chris and Parker tear into It (2017), with some helpful references to It (1990). Takes abound.

Episode IX: Shin Godzilla

Crack open a cold one with the boys as they don their Jet Jaguar outfits and prepare to take on the Terror of Tokyo, Shin Godzilla! The lads spend a good hour talking about the news and some recent movies they've seen, then they dig into some reptile meat. Two words about the editing: I used Godzilla's roar to cut me off whenever I started gushing about Satomi Ishihara, and I included the Brandenburg Concerto No. 2 in F Major, Third Movement (Allegro assai), by Johann Sebastian Bach for our debate segment.

Episode VIII: Dunkirk

Crack open a cold one with the boys as they escape from the island of bad movies and discuss one of the best war movies ever created. I also confused Suspiria and Disturbia because I'm a colossal dunce.

Episode VII: The Emoji Movie

Crack open a cold one with the boys as Chris struggles with his wifi connection and Parker tortures him with another insufferable news segment. This is the most terrible episode yet.

Episode VI: Planet of the Apes

Crack open a cold one with the boys as they discover man's destiny with the Planet of the Apes series. Chris delves into the 1968 and 2001 versions while Parker lays out his worst torture yet with the news dump.

Episode V: The Mummy

Crack open a cold one with the boys and unwrap some adventure in the Middle East with the most stunningly underrated movie in years. Sure, there are better movies out there, but Chris and Parker explain as eloquently as always exactly why The Mummy is not only a very good movie, but indeed a most excellent movie.

Episode IV: Transformers: The Last Knight

Crack open a cold one with the boys as they exorcise some demons. After this episode is done, Parker and Chris will never have another reason to cast their minds back toward Transformers - at least until one texts the other "Cade Jaeger" apropos of nothing. I have no idea why I sound so stuffed up.

Episode III: A Transformers Retrospective

Crack open a cold one with the boys as they explore the first four Transformers movies. Parker went through the pain and effort to watch all these movies and write up a plot synopsis for each one, and he unleashes this horror on Chris. New addition: the News Segment.

Episode II: Wonder Woman

Crack open a cold one with the boys as they dissect the first ever good DCEU movie. Parker and Chris delve in Gal Gadot and Chris Pine, the no man's land scene, the romance, the comedy, and that damned slo-mo. Critics and fans agree: this is the sixth-biggest non-sequel comic book superhero debut ever. We fixed the audio from the first episode and actually talked about the subject of the week for more than 15 minutes.

Don’t worry women, I will protect you

Episode I: Guardians of the Galaxy, vol. 2

The first ever episode of the Reel Deal, No Sex Appeal, featuring the sultry voice of Parker and the overmodulated screaming of Chris. Today, the boys take on Guardians of the Galaxy, Vol. 2 - hold on to your seats for this hot take: they liked it. Things veer off course somewhat as the ramifications of comic book movies in general proves a more fertile ground for discussion.

I dont want to tell you not to listen to this, but…don’t listen to it. 


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