Bad Games You Should Play Anyway: Metroid

The trailer for a new Metroid game dropped recently; maybe it's just my algorithm but I've seen a bunch of posts from people who are just getting into the series because of that trailer. It's an encouraging sign; the Metroid series is absolutely worth playing. Super Metroid, Metroid Prime, and Metroid Dread are some of the greatest games ever made. Sure, there have been a handful of slip-ups along the way, but the series is beloved for a very good reason: it's one of the more generally consistent Nintendo franchises in terms of quality. One thing that struck me is that many fans are advising the newcomers to play Metroid: Zero Mission instead of the first game, which inspired me to create a new series on this blog called Bad Games You Should Play Anyway.

Ninja - Mind if a White Boy Studies a Little Bushido?

In a world ruled from the shadows by the invisible hand of the ninja, there are none more feared than the one white guy who studies there. 

Abominable - What if 'Rear Window' Had a Bigfoot?

Every 43 seconds, a new Bigfoot movie is added to Tubi. Watching all of them is not for the faint of heart. Only an experienced moron such as myself can undertake the exhaustive effort of sifting through them. I am but a humble prospector, trying to strike gold. I am very pleased to announce a fat payload, because Abominable is one of The Good Ones.

Fixed: The Worst Movie I'll See All Year

Written by: Jon Vitti, Genndy Tartakovsky (allegedly)
Directed by: Genndy Tartakovsky (allegedly)
Starring: Adam DeVine, Idris Elba, Kathryn Hahn, Fred Armisen
Shat out by: Sony Pictures Animation
Spread around by: Netflix
Runtime: mercifully under 90 minutes

I watched an animated movie about a talking dog and I didn't like it.

Stand by Me - Stephen King's Best Movie

                                                  

Written by: Stephen King, Raynold Gideon, Bruce A. Evans
Directed by: Rob Reiner
Starring: River Phoenix, Wil Wheaton, Corey Feldman, Jerry O'Connell, Kiefer Sutherland, John Cusack, Richard Dreyfuss

"It was on the tip of my tongue to tell them about the deer. But I didn't. That was the one thing I kept to myself. I've never spoken or written about it until just now."

Halloween III: Attack of the Magical Irish Androids

Written by: Tommy Lee Wallace, Nigel Kneale (uncredited), Debra Hill (idea)

Directed by: Tommy Lee Wallace
Produced by: Debra Hill & John Carpenter
Cinematography: Dean Cundey
Soundtrack by: John Carpenter & Alan Howarth
Starring: Tom Atkins, Stacey Nelkin, Dan O'Herlihy

There are precisely two (2) good movies in the Halloween franchise. The first is Halloween (1978). The other is Halloween III: Season of the Witch.

Flight Risk: A Disaster Movie, but Not the Good Kind Like You Want

 

Written by: Jared Rosenberg
Directed by: the award-winning director of Braveheart, Apocalypto, and Hacksaw Ridge

Starring: Marky Mark, Michelle Dockery, Christopher Grace

Frankly I expect better from Mel Gibson.