The Oscars are this Sunday and I am livid. Outraged. Incensed. Peeved. During my lifetime I’ve watched the Academy of Motion Pictures Arts and Sciences prove again and again that they are out of touch. Remnants of a different era, shambling along past their expiration date; a dozen Crypt Keepers who stay frozen in stasis only to be thawed out once a year to pull the lever that says racism is cancelled. They are a relic that needs to be thrown into the trash, and that was made apparent by the complete and total absence of Dragon Ball Super: Broly at the awards.
Written by: T.S. Eliot, Lee Hall, Tom Hooper, Andrew Lloyd Webber
Directed by: Tom Hooper
Starring: Francesca Hayward, Robbie Fairchild, Judi Dench, Ian McKellan, Idris Elba, James Corden, Rebel Wilson, Jason Derulo, Jennifer Hudson, Taylor Swift
Budget: $90,000,000
Imagine, if you will, being kidnapped on a stereotypical dark and stormy night, where rain assaults the pavement, and you're tossed into a burlap sack and thrown into the backseat of a car. The car drives for awhile; how many miles or how many hours, you're not really sure, you're in such a daze. It finally skids to a halt and you get tossed out onto the concrete. You emerge from the sack and look out into the most desolate city alleyway you've ever seen, dimly lit only by the dingiest of street lamps - and what appear to be eyes, glowing in the distance, watching you. You're scared, you're wet, you're weak, you're alone - and then a hand reaches out of the distance and you hear a voice that asks: "Would you like to watch me make the Jellicle choice?"
The decade comes to a dramatic conclusion with a new Star Wars film, but not the good kind like you want. The final episode of 2019 sees Chris, Parker, and Official Star Wars Correspondent Alex watch Episode IX: The Rise of Skywalker and discuss it in excruciating detail. Spoilers: we did not care for it.
No news segment, no recently watched, just 2 hours of the hottest Star Wars takes.
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